You Must Be This Happy to Enter by Elizabeth Crane

Author:Elizabeth Crane [Crane, Elizabeth]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: General Fiction
ISBN: 9781933354439
Publisher: Akashic Books
Published: 2008-02-01T05:00:00+00:00

SALLY

(FEATURING: LOLLIPOP THE RAINBOW UNICORN)

THERE IS NOT ONE THING even a little bit sad about this story. This is pretty much the happiest story ever. If you’re all up into War and Peace or whichever, you won’t find it here.

This story is about a woman who was always herself. What better story could there be than that? Plus it’s true, or mostly true. It’s true enough. It’s true-seeming.

One presumes that Sally, is her name, started out being a girl who was always herself. You have heard it told that she was herself as a teenager, so it’s a logical conclusion, even if it is hard to imagine. Because do you know any teenagers who are themselves? I doubt it. Teenagers are all about being other people. You so wish you’d known her when you were a teenager, but she was born in the ’70s, so she would have been in preschool at the time. Although Sally at four was probably more you than you are after all the therapy. You don’t really know much about her life as a preschooler, so you don’t know whether her parents did anything really right or really wrong, and my feeling is that it doesn’t really matter. My feeling is that Sally became Sally regardless of whether or not her parents did anything right or wrong. And I’m not talking about genetics either, since I don’t know thing one about that. Let’s just put it like this: On the day Sally was born, the stars collided or the planets aligned or the people stepped over the cracks and it worked out how it did. All you know is, maybe if you had even babysat for her or something, your life could have gone a different way. You could possibly have learned from her even then with regard to being yourself. I realize you’re fine now, but there were some ineffective years. We both know it.

So but look at Sally. She’s That Girl looking at herself in the store window and seeing versions of herself all around the city, except if That Girl had an eyebrow ring, big boots, and was a happy, funny revolutionary and there were no Donald Hollingers. Nothing that looks like Donald Hollinger, nothing that acts like Donald Hollinger, no ex–Donald Hollinger to be gotten rid of. No Donald Hollinger of any kind. It’s not that she doesn’t enjoy the company of men, you have heard that she does, it’s not even that she wouldn’t like the company of a nice man, you have heard this as well, it’s simply that having a man, even a nice one, is not critical to her being completely, joyfully Sally. This, to you, is only theoretical. To you it’s something to hope for, but you are not feeling so completely joyfully you without a Mr. You. Seventy-eight percent joyful on a good day, maybe, which is an improvement over other times in your life, but still. Do you see what I’m saying? Do you know anyone like this? Probably not.

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